


war is hell but that's not the half of it

by haipollai



Category: Captain America (2011)
Genre: Howling Commandos - Freeform, Injury, Wartime, friends - Freeform, teammates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-06
Updated: 2012-08-06
Packaged: 2017-11-11 13:20:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/478975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haipollai/pseuds/haipollai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Steve even has the audacity to ruffle his hair and tell him at least they know he's going to be fine, he's pouting too much to be hurt. Bucky humphs and pulls up the collar of his jacket, grumbling he does not cry or pout, he was shot in the leg and maybe he'll die just to spite them all. Steve's grinning at him and Bucky remembers when his pouting actually got a reaction out of Steve, when he was about ten and Steve still thought he was somehow the champion in their relationship.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	war is hell but that's not the half of it

They're finally on their way out, getting to an extraction point to get back to a base and start the whole thing over again. They were supposed to be there two days and thirteen hours ago. The delay is Bucky's fault. Steve spent most of the hike to their current location trying to convince Bucky it wasn't actually his fault. Dugan made a loud argument for it being the Nazis fault actually and Morita strongly laid blame on the bullet which had hit his thigh. Falsworth was at least quieter about saying that the hero complex was best left to the actual hero. They all ignored Bucky himself when he tried to argue that he had taught Steve all that hero stuff. Even Steve ignored him which wasn't even fair, considering the man had an arm around Bucky and was supporting most of his weight despite insisting he could at least walk dammit.

The spot they pick doesn't even deserve the label of clearing. It's a space between trees. They're scrunched up close enough that their knees touch and Bucky has no choice but to keep his injured leg sprawled over Steve's lap. As if Steve needs an excuse to poke at his injury and make sure it's not getting worse. From there he watches the rest set up camp, Dernier and Jones disappear to set up a trip wire. Bucky keeps his rifle close at hand and there's no way anyone is convincing him to let go of the damn thing. Not even Steve and his big sad eyes.

They sit around embers, since it's too dangerous for a fire. Even the embers might be too much but it's November and they're cold so rules and regulations about when and where to light a fire can go to hell for all they care. They are confident whether they deserve to be or not, whoever tries to come at them will be taken care of. So it doesn't matter that they are behind enemy lines; they are warmer then they had been five minutes ago, their last mission had been a success and they've managed to convince Dernier to break into his coveted chocolate stash. Dugan convinced him but they were all taking credit. Falsworth even contributes his cigarettes because he doesn't smoke them that often anyway.

They all settle in around their little ember fire. At first too tired to talk much. Not until the chocolate and cigarettes kick in. Bucky gratefully accepts the cigarette Jones passes him, his own had been used up weeks ago. Mostly traded for good night or a fresh meal while they trooped through the French countryside.

The burn spreads through his whole body fighting against the damp that's soaked through his uniform. The cigarette goes to Steve next and continues around their small circle. They're onto Bucky's leg now and Falsworth is doing a scarily good impression of Bucky's own voice. Though he protests that he never once cried like that. Morita joins in, clutching at his own leg and swooning into Dugan who has become Steve in their reenactment.

Bucky always tenses at any kind of teasing of Steve, an old reflex that he's never bothered to shake. Didn't have to until a year ago when he let himself be dragged into this mess that they call a team. But Steve is smiling so he rolls his eyes at them and relaxes. Jones is barely keeping it together enough to translate the tricky bits to Dernier and whatever is being said back is ruining the rest of Jones' control.

Steve even has the audacity to ruffle his hair and tell him at least they know he's going to be fine, he's pouting too much to be hurt. Bucky humphs and pulls up the collar of his jacket, grumbling he does not cry or pout, he was shot in the leg and maybe he'll die just to spite them all. Steve's grinning at him and Bucky remembers when his pouting actually got a reaction out of Steve, when he was about ten and Steve still thought he was somehow the champion in their relationship.

Dugan at least has pity on him and changes the subject to Jones and the women he's managed to collect throughout France. Dernier claps Jones on the shoulder and says he learned from a true Frenchman and then everyone has to know what stories Dernier is hiding to be able to smirk like that. Even Bucky gets into it, forgetting his leg for a little bit because someone has to proclaim that Dernier is full of it. He shifts trying to get more comfortable on the hard ground and with the tree catching his hair and pulling whenever he turns his head.

Steve yanks on his arm so he falls against him and grumbles that Bucky's going to need to finally get his damn hair cut. Bucky grins and says he likes looking like a scoundrel. Morita overhears them and asks if Barnes grows it out more can they braid it? Dugan suggests pink ribbons and Jones says he knows a girl or two he can get some from. Steve says that's the only way he'll allow Bucky to grow out his hair, otherwise he better plan on cutting it.

Bucky can't entirely believe he was just ordered to cut his hair.

Dugan yawns and declares it's Morita's turn for first watch. All eyes turn to Steve who has settled into his role as commander easily. He agrees with Dugan and no one really wants to be the one to question the man with the photographic memory which only leaves the rest of them to settle in for the night. Bucky takes some comfort in knowing his injury means he won't be asked to keep watch. He still keeps his hand on his rifle, just in case.

The ground is damp, even close to their pathetic fire, even the embers are barely lit now and it gets into his jacket, finding the thinnest spots and getting through. If it was just the damp he could sleep through it with no problem, but the damp and the pain in his leg together keep him up, staring across the fire pit to Dernier snoring softly. It isn't a pretty sight.

With a sigh of disgust he rolls onto his back. Now there's a rock pressed into his side so he rolls back onto his side. A hand touches his leg and he twists around to look at Steve. His look tells Bucky to stop squirming and lie the hell still. Bucky responds by kicking at him, immediately regretting it. The morphine had worn off hours ago and he wasn't about to ask anyone for more. He could handle this. Except he never accounts for how well Steve knows him. Steve is moving, coming around to lie against his back.

I've got you, he whispers. Morita's not even hiding the fact he's watching them. He notices Bucky looking back and he pulls out a pipette, tossing it across. Bucky doesn't reach for it but it wasn't thrown to him. It's okay to be weak, Steve continues, trust me and there's a smile in his voice that Bucky can't help but snort at. Strong fingers get underneath the bandage to bare skin and he tracks Steve through touch as he sits up to inspect. Bucky grits his teeth to hide the pain.

Steve sighs in disappointment and that hurts worse then the leg. The sting of the pipette breaking through skin distracts from it all and slowly the morphine dulls everything. Morita nods in approval and goes back to his watch. Bucky takes a moment to be immature and sticks his tongue out at him. Morita still notices and flicks him off. Steve is pressed against his back, an arm over Bucky's abdomen and breath on his neck. 

He feels good, he's got a hole in his leg and he feels good. The feeling is still there in the morning when he's shaken awake by Dugan who looks like he was just woken up himself. Steve is already up but Bucky can see him only a few feet away, poking at the remains of their fire with Jones to get it hot enough to maybe heat a can of something. Bucky doesn't even complain when Dernier pokes at his leg and hands over a replacement bandage. Falsworth jokes that he'll have another excuse to get girls interested in what's hidden in his pants. Bucky shoots back that he doesn't need girls, he's already got Dernier's hand groping around. 

Dernier waggles his eyebrows but luckily doesn't cop a feel. Bucky isn't sure his masculinity could handle being molested by a Frenchman at the moment. There are some beans and stale bread for breakfast and then Steve's hauling him to his feet again. He grits his teeth against the resurgent pain. When he can breath properly, he reminds Steve that sticking him with more morphine will only mean carrying him back all the way to Allied territory and they all know they need Steve able to fight in an emergency.

Steve relents though obviously none of them like it. After a short break for lunch, Dugan gets Barnes crutch duty and they bitch at each other until Morita threatens to shoot them both and blame the Germans. Not that it stops them and if anyone really minded there were more effective ways of shutting them up.

Time slips by in a weird mix of fast and slow, everything looking the same since they have to avoid roads and open space but it starts getting dark again and they sit down to make sure they haven't gone in circles during the day and eat a little more of their rations. Bucky flops against a tree beside Falsworth and lets Steve and Dernier argue it out. Jones checks the injury too and Bucky wants to yell at them all that the damn thing is bandaged and will heal up better without them poking it every five minutes.

But they're family now and Bucky learned from Steve what it meant to have family, so he lets them poke and prod and whoops when they reach base and there's a cot waiting for him. The doctor gives him a disapproving look, he should have stayed off the leg. Steve nudges him and he nudges back and reminding him of that one time, and the other time, and oh yes that time too until Steve is blushing. He throws up his hands and lets Bucky win.

When the doctor is done, Steve is allowed to carry him to the small area assigned to the Howling Commandos. Everyone else is already there, huddled under tarps to avoid the rain and playing cards. Others on base whisper about them, the Commandos and their science experiment of a leader but they're careful to not say anything to any of their faces. Bucky makes sure to tell them about all the newest rumors he heard about them in the Medical tent while pretending to be unconscious. His favorite involves Dugan holding a General at gunpoint and a Japanese assassin. 

The rain is drumming down around them, turning dirt into mud, mixing it with blood and sweat and all the sins of wartime. Bucky props up his legs in Steve's lap to avoid it and for a few minutes there is no war, there's no mad man trying to fuck up the entire world. They're just some guys with nothing better to do then play cards.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Tim O'Brien _The Things They Carried_


End file.
